Is the great Jack Nicholson retiring from acting? Some say yes, others say no. He hasn’t been in a film since 2010 and perusing IMDB shows he has nothing in the works. It could just be he’s taking a break. When you’re an actor with three Oscars, you can do that.
Despite the fact Nicholson’s retirement is not confirmed, we’ll still pay him some respect. So without further ado, we present the Pocket Full Of Liberty Jack Nicholson Awards:
The Colonel Nathan R. Jessup “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!” Award
This award goes to President Barack Obama who gave new meaning to the word “audacity” when at the G-20 summit this week, he let loose with the whopper that he didn’t say anything about “red lines” with Syria. He also claimed his credibility was not “on the line”, pushing it back across the table like those kids in the Life cereal commercial. Anna blew up that nonsense and Amy on the podcast last night said, “President Obama may be the only president I have ever seen who’s thrown the whole world under the bus.”
The R.P McMurphy “I must be crazy to be in a loony bin like this” Award
This is being given to the train wreck NYC mayoral candidate, Anthony Weiner. It seems every other day there is another “incident” involving Weiner. Thankfully, this has nothing to do with him sexting skanks or anything like that. No this one is being given to him for engaging in a New York City style shouting match at a bakery with one of his potential constituents. Nothing says “leadership” like berating some guy with your mouth stuffed with cake.
The Jack Torrance “I’m just going to bash your brains in” Award
This award goes to the geniuses who thought for whatever reason, that a video game where you attempt to get an abortion was a good idea. The level of buffoonery is so high with this one, the average person would say to Jack Torrance, “Bury that ax right here in my head. I don’t want to live in a world filled with such asinine people.”
The Melvin Udall, “Go sell crazy somewhere else. We’re all stocked up here” Award
This award goes to the idiots in who live in Florida’s 9th Congressional district for having the temerity to send Alan Grayson back to the halls of Congress. Unceremoniously dumped after 2 bat-shit crazy years, Florida’s congressional district realignment allowed him once again to be able to sully the halls of the Capitol Building. His latest kooky tirade? That the Obama administration manipulated intelligence about Syria. It’s one thing to disagree with a potential war, but this is just nuts.
The Jack Napier/Joker “This town needs an enema!” Award
This is being given to the politicians of Illinois, who thought it was a good idea to spend $670,000 on some doors for the capitol building in Springfield. Meanwhile, the state has pensions that are underfunded to the tune of $100 billion and an unemployment rate of 9.1%. Great decision everybody!
And that’s going to do it for this week’s awards! Have a great weekend!